Why Do We Crave Feedback?
If you look at one thing most people crave in their day it is feedback. What is feedback? It can be sourced by many activities. It is like a ping received by radar sensors when that something is out there and it sends back a signal we have been detected.
Why is this important? We seem to have a need to know that we exist. We want others to recognize we exist. This is one reason people check their phone every ten seconds. They want to see if someone wants to communicate with them. We want family. This gives us feedback that we exist and someone cares. We want feedback at work because we want to know we are doing something that matters and we are contributing.
Social Media is the Feedback Center of the Universe
Social media is built on our need for feedback. What do all the “likes” and “followers” tell us about what we are communicating? We rank our ability to get feedback. Entertainers love the feedback they create. They are getting instant acknowledgement for what they are communicating. Writing a book that sells is feedback. We want to tell the world something and we hope people resonate with our message, information or story.
Some people are better at generating feedback than others. A top athlete is going to get more feedback than a mediocre athlete. Is the feedback the motivation or the reward? Top entertainers get more feedback. Is it the motivation or the reward? They are interchangeable. We want to find out who we are. We dedicate ourselves to learning something. We have the need to share to get feedback. The extent we succeed could be measured partly by the fame we achieve. It could also be measured by the money we receive if that is a goal.
We might be rewarded by the number of followers whether in social media or real life. Is a politician a person who craves feedback and relies on it? The politician wants to serve, maybe wants power, maybe wants to make change that quantifies his contribution, or maybe just has a need to be in the limelight. The media and the voters will give him feedback.
What Happens without Feedback?
What happens if we are not getting feedback? Maybe loneliness. What is the definition of loneliness? Isolation. If we are isolated, we are not getting any feedback that we exist. The world has forgotten about us or doesn’t care about us? How threatening is this to the human psyche? Very. People may have big fears about being isolated or not receiving ping backs that prove existence.
What are some good ways to improve feedback? Emotional intelligence. People love to be treated fairly and know they are important as we have discussed. When someone acknowledges they are listening or has empathy for what we are expressing, we are drawn to that person. We may want that person to be our leader and certainly our friend. Women have excelled because they generally prove they are more empathetic than men.
Developing the Feedback that is Rewarding
Kindness is a great technique, not implying manipulation, that people respond to and react with trusting us. When we are kind, it demonstrates we allow for differences and are accepting. Accepting people is a path to more favorable feedback.
Developing trust is a bond that unites people. When people trust us they are more likely to be open and share their feelings and needs. They are, therefore, telling us we are important to them. In business, trust is important for working relationships. Athletic teams stress trust to reach true potential. Trusting your teammates to do their job allows you the freedom to do yours. Synergies are created out of trust.
Being an entrepreneur is a great path for feedback. We create something important for people in their lives and they buy it. Being an artist is a great path for feedback. If people like our work, they respond. Being a leader is a great path for feedback. People acknowledge we are creating value.
There is a saying that if you want to understand what you are putting out into the world, look at what is coming back. That is feedback. What type of feedback are you receiving in your daily life? What are you putting out to the world in your daily life. It matters.
